Last week a story made the rounds in the main stream media about an incident that took place at a coffee shop in Tacoma, Washington.
A man dressed in women’s clothing pulled up to a coffee shop called “Java Girls” and allegedly exposed himself to one of the baristas. The barista then threw a cup of boiling water in his lap before he had the chance to get away.
At the Fox News website, I had the opportunity to watch a video in which Fox News interviewed the barista who threw the cup of boiling water on the alleged suspect. (“Coffee Confrontation” in US news videos)
After watching the interview, and hearing the female anchor praise the girl as being brave, I have to challenge the estrogen bravado spun from this story and offer my opinion of the barista and the praise of Fox’s female anchor.
The name of the coffee house is called “Java Girls” for a reason. All the barista’s have to be female, and more importantly, the women must serve coffee in the tiniest bikinis they can find. In other words, the whole concept of the coffee house is to stimulate and manipulate the sexual perversions of men. From strippers, to call girls, to Hooter’s girls, to rap music, the concept is always the same – use the female body along with the allure of male sexual fantasies (whatever form it may take) to achieve one goal – to take money from men.
So my question is, “Who is the bigger pervert here?”
This woman took a job with the full knowledge that her job requires her to be scantily dressed with the main purpose of catering to the dark side of male sexuality. She spends hours each day, half naked, serving coffee to male clients along with other half naked women, with the full knowledge that she and her co-workers are catering to a clientele that views her and the other women in a highly sexualized “perverted” manner. But she is shocked by the “perverted” behavior of the man who exposed himself.
Is this irony or hypocrisy?
In the interview she claims the man went through the shop’s drive through three times. Each episode had about ten minutes between them. The barista said she brushed off her first encounter with the man as just a foolish prank. But she says after the second time, and especially the third time, she and her co-worker became really scared.
How scared were they? The women were so scared that they never called the police. Instead, the women enacted a scheme to douse him with boiling water if he should return for a third time. In the ten minutes they had between his second appearance and his third, the only “safety” measures the women procured was to create their plan, prepare the glass of boiling water, and lie in wait for their victim.
Does this sound like a vulnerable, frightened victim, or does it sound more like a psychotic vigilante?
The man made no attempt to harm them physically by trying to force his way into the coffee shop, however, the female baristas seemed to imply this was their biggest fear.
But contrary to their story, instead of fearing a physical altercation with a mentally unstable man, the women devised a scheme to purposely engage the man into a dangerous physical confrontation by dousing his genitals with boiling water. This female bravado had the potential to enrage the man as much as chase him away, and provoke the very physical altercation the women claimed they feared the most. Only after engaging him in this physical confrontation did they decide to call the police.
Jane Skinner, the female Fox News anchor taking part in conducting the interview with the barista is obsessed in the interview with finding out if the boiling water scolded his genitals. I’m not talking about a generalized curiosity. I’m talking about a contemptuous curiosity and a malevolent obsession that the man has received permanent, emotional and physical scars that will make his the rest of his life a living hell.
At the very beginning of the interview she states to her co-anchor that she can’t wait to find out if the barista “got him where it counts”. At the end of the interview she states maliciously to the barista, “I’m sure you got him where it counts.”
What’s the obsession?
Skinner accents the interview with moans and groans of disgust. She concludes her interview by telling the vigilante barista that she is brave, and opines, “A lot of women out there are saying, you go girl!”
A couple of comments:
— It’s disturbing to observe in our society that male genital mutilation is an accepted form of justice, empowerment, revenge, or humor, while anything resembling female genital mutilation is nothing short of barbaric. What the man did is criminal, but he does not deserve to have his genitals mutilated. The women were never in any immediate danger, and this is validated by the fact that they never called the police until after THEY instigated a physical confrontation with him.
As for Jane Skinner’s obsession with male genital mutilation, I’m wondering if she and others who feel similarly also feel the number of female school teachers that are raping their under aged male students should have their vagina’s mutilated to “teach them a lesson”. If she does not have the same emotional reaction towards female perverts, then she has serious issues with sexism, bigotry, and gender discrimination issues that need serious attention. It would seem completely asinine to think that a man who exposes himself to a woman deserves genital mutilation more than a woman who actually forces herself physically and emotionally on some mother’s pubescent son.
— The barista should have been charged with a crime as well as the man who exposed himself. For example, if their was a male manager on duty, who upon seeing what had happened chased the man down and beat him silly, the police would have arrested and charged the male manager with assault. Their reasoning? They would piously invoke the mantra of respect for laws, individual rights, safety of oneself and others, the need for calm and order in chaotic situations, taking the law into your own hands, etc., for not condoning this type of vigilantism. However, because the vigilante is a woman and the act of violence was directed towards a man, the crime is overlooked.
As an example, if a father caught his son’s female elementary school teacher having sex with his son, and in a rage, attempted to mutilated her genitals, do you think the police would ignore his violent act and arrest only the teacher? And if the police did react in that manner, do you think the media and women’s groups would stay silent?
— The hypocrisy from women in situations like these is overwhelming. The same people who complain about society’s sexploitation of women, are the first in line to defend two women who choose to exploit themselves for a quick buck. The women should not have to endure mentally unstable men exposing themselves, but at the same time, in situations like these, responsible women do not extend an austere statement to the baristas and other women explaining how the choices they make affect themselves and others such as:
Do you realize your choice of work put you in this situation?
Does this line of work help or harm your self-esteem?
What examples and sexual boundries are you advocating for younger girls?
If women really cared about the sexploitation of women, these comments should be included along with their disgust for the man that exposed himself.
— The mature, responsible men in society need to become more involved in mentoring the younger generations about the balance between sexual fantasies and sexual realities. While women are concerned about the sexploitation of women, I’m a firm believer that this same sexploitation seriously affects men as well. Sadly, sexual desire and sexual fantasies are used to sell everything these days. It invokes the wrong message to young men and young women.
I believe as a man, older men need to become more prominent in the processes of mentoring young men on the dark side of male sexual fantasies. Young men need to learn the beauty of their masculine sexual nature, but also need to understand the dangers of it, and how others will exploit it for their own benefit.
I feel that if beginning at a young age men were given insight into how to maintain a balanced emotional and mental male sexuality from more mature, responsible male figures, places like the “Java Girls” may not disappear, but they may have less of an allure in the eyes of men. This would benefit both men and women.
For the record, I am not a puritan who believes anything sexual is bad, and that places such as Java Girls shouldn’t exits. I just believe the level of mentoring and education for our young men and women should intensify at the same pace as the sexualized environment.
If there is one positive I can take away from this story it’s this: Given the number of enterprises in our society that cater to the dark side of men’s sexuality, and given the general public opinion that men are always thinking with their penises, according to statistics, the majority of men do not engage in this type of behavior. In other words, if men really are sex crazed machines as some believe, an incident like this would not be a “hot” news story making national news – it would be a common one buried in the back pages of the local newspaper.
Considering the sexualized society we live in, I feel it shows the majority of men handle themselves quite well given an environment which entices them to behave otherwise.